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Family Communication

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My husband and I went on a date the other night.  He is pretty big on communication and the topic came up.  I am a total introvert.  I am perfectly fine without talking to a single person all day.  :-P  I promised him I would open our lines of communication up a little bit more.
Something that we have done every night after stories or at dinner since our children could talk is state two things…
1.  My favorite part of the day was when….
2.  The part of the day I didn’t like was when…
These two things usually open up some great conversation with our children.
I have seen posts like this floating around…
The next morning after our date night THIS  popped up in my feed.
I take those types of things as signs to get your butt moving on this!  So I came up with a plan.  First, I compiled a list of 20 questions/statements for the kids.  Then I compiled a list of 20 questions for my husband.  You can see these lists at the end of the post.
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We have a chalkboard in our dining room.  I started to write a statement down every few days for us to talk about during dinner.  This is more of a weekly thing than an every day thing.  Who can keep up with this stuff?  :-P  Sometimes the statement stays on the board for a few days.  Sometimes there are more than one up at a time.
For my husband I started sending him a morning email with these 3 things:
  1.  Something that bothers me (If anything at the time).
2.  Something that I love about him
3.  A question to be answered.
I send him an email because I know it’s something I can do during the week.  Sometimes at the end of the day the last thing we want to do is have any sort of meaningful conversation.  I feel this helps us stay connected throughout the day and I love the responses.  I’m the type of person that likes to think on things.  There are often times someone will ask me something and I stare at them like… huh??  LOL  Then a day or so later I probably could have written a whole book on the topic.  Is anyone else this way… or am I the only crazy person?  :-P
For the kids (ages 3, 5, and 6) I tend to give them statements instead of questions.  I feel they do much better with these.  I typically go first and they are free to follow… or not.  They usually respond, but there are some days they don’t feel like talking and that is OK. There are a lot of days I don’t feel like talking either!

20 statements for kids:

1.  My favorite animal is….
2.  I feel upset when….
3.  If I had a play date today I would invite…
4.  If I had a sleepover I would invite…
5.  (Person’s name) makes me feel good inside when…
6.  My favorite thing we did this week was when…
7.  I don’t like when….
8.  My favorite food is…
9.  If I could turn into any animal I would be a….
10.  I could help someone this week by…
11.  A good friend is someone who….
12.  My favorite thing to do outside…
13.  I know how to…
14.  If I could have one superpower it would be…
15.  If I had one wish, I would wish for…..
16.  One thing I want to do tomorrow is….
17.  My favorite time of the day is…
18.  If I could be anywhere right now it would be….
19.  I feel like I don’t get enough love when…
20.  If we could have one more animal it would be a…

20 Questions for significant other:

1.  If there was anywhere you could be right now where would it be?
2.  Do you ever think about having a boy/girl?
3.  If there was one thing you could say to your dad what would it be? Your mom?
4.  Your favorite childhood memory?
5.  Your greatest accomplishment?
6.  One thing you could take back?
7.  Biggest mistake you made?
8.  Biggest fear?
9.  One thing you want to improve on?
10.  One person you would want to be your neighbor?
11.  One thing you could change about yourself?
12.  What did your parents teach you that you appreciate now?
13.  What do you find attractive about me?
14.  What can I do to encourage or support you better?
15.  What do you love about each of our children?
16.  If you won the lottery, what is the first thing you would do?
17.  If you had to leave and never return what 3 things would you take with you (not including people).
18.  Most embarrassing moment?
19.  If you could bring one person back to life for a day who would it be?
20.  If you could go anywhere on vacation with just us where would it be? With the kids?
We hope this helps you open your lines of communication up.
Do you have some questions you want to share to help others stay connected?  Leave a blog post comment!
RL

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3 Responses to Family Communication

  1. Lee says:

    Thanks for posting this! I had seen the key jar thing as well but I think your questions may work a bit better for my younger kids (ages 5, almost 3, and 1). I also love how you incorporated something similar with your spouse. Seems like when you have young children it is easy to only talk about things revolving around them!

  2. Angeltots says:

    I like these!! I am like you. I am perfectly fine not talking to anyone the whole day. Great questions and topics. :)

  3. Melissa says:

    Love it! Huge introvert here as well. I went away for the weekend without kids (first time in a year and a half) and commented to someone I had forgotten how to carry on a conversation. Some of the questions you listed for your significant other would be great conversation starters with family and friends as well.

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